Big Sister

Emery Fate Speigel
My sweet, curly-haired, almost 3 year old only child.
I have not taken the time to think of the things that are about to change for my sweet angel. I have thought about it broadly, how she will have a friend to do things with, to share with. I hadn't thought about the small things, not in depth at least. I read a blog tonight that turned my world upside down. It is a blog about a second child, the day she was born, and the mom being... oh I don't know what word describes it best... scared, surprised, caught off guard once the sweet second child was laid on her chest. This mother mentioned how she spent the last few hours with her oldest daughter, and pointed out how she would not be an only child much longer. At this point, my heart ached for my sweet Emery, and I went and held her as she was sleeping and I wept. The things she is going to experience, the changes this means for her; I knew, but never really thought about how different it will be for her.
After holding my big girl for 15 minutes or so I came back to finish reading the blog. The second child/baby in the blog had down syndrome and it was not known until her birthday by anyone. The mom describes all the different emotions and how the next few days went for her and how she grew and found her bond with the baby that was not what she had expected. This made me think of a friend who had a baby at full-term born still-born. What will I do if these things happen to me? How will I handle them? Most mom's just expect a nice healthy 100% normal baby, but in reality not every baby is.
I know God cherishes children, and I know down syndrome is not the end of the world by any means. I know if I have a baby born sleeping I will learn from it. What I want to know is, what would my natural instinct be? Or maybe I don't want to know... My heart aches the way any mother's would.
My world has been shaken tonight. 1. My first sweet girl is about to have her world turned upside down and affected in who knows what ways. 2. You never know what could happen during or after delivery. It is in God's hands and I know he only gives these special babies to those who are very deserving of them, but I pray if I were to have such circumstances happen upon me that I would have the strength to be the mommy I need to be.
Thank you God for bringing this blog onto my path.

Happy Holidays!

Hey there everyone!
I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas, and give a brief update.
I am LOVING not working (well out of the house), snuggling with my daughter, babysitting and of course getting my Mary Kay shine on! We're going out of town to see my Father in Law for a few days, then to my Mother In Laws for a bit after that. I am so excited to get to go see everyone!
My babyshower is on December 28 for this baby GIRL number 2. I am so blessed to have a mother-in-law who cares so much. I didn't get a baby shower for my first since we were in Washington, so this is truly exciting.
I can't wait to get back and only have about 50 days left til my due date! Things are happening, and they are happening quickly!
How are you doing?! What are your holiday plans?!

Thaksgiving in Dallas

Well well well.

I am elated that we are back in Texas around family, especialy at this time of year! We went up to Dallas (well technically Frisco) mid-Wednesday and the traffic was not terrible, but not the greatest either. My little girl lit up seeing her Granny & Mr. Mark (her granny's long-term boyfriend). She just loves seeing them! Wednesday was pretty relaxed. Thanksgiving Thursday we went to Mr. Mark's parent's house and it was just like I remember from last year, only my husband was home with us to indulge in the holiday goodies!

Mr. Mark's dad is in his 70's and has Alzheimers. It has gotten so much worse over this past year. He is about half the weight he was (which wasn't much to begin with), he was talking to random objects, or no objects at all and he was attempting to eat everything, edible or not. It breaks my heart to think what his marriage is going through, what he is going through, the family. I mean, if it hurts me so bad to know what he is going through, you know the grandchildren children and wife must be devistated. I spent most of Thanksgiving worried about him, hoping he is enjoying being around family, when he remembers who they are of course.

I really don't know too much about Alzheimers, other than it makes people forget... I've decided it is time to research. I learned this past week that there are more symptoms than just memory loss, and I want to know more about it.

Thursday I must have ate too much, ended up sick multiple times throughout the night and ended up going to L&D to get checked out since I couldn't keep anything down. Gas, of course it felt like I was in pre-term labor though. Thankfully, baby is doing great and a bit of nausea medicine cleared things up.

My little family and I indulged in a few clothing items each on Black Friday, and saw nothing crazy, thank goodness. By the time Friday came to a close I was pretty sad. It is so nice having people around who are family. I hadn't had this feeling before, the comfortable feeling of knowing these people will love you no matter what. I am so thankful for my Mother-In-Law and her side of the family, including "Mr. Mark".

We headed back home on Saturday and I went straight to a networking event and met some great women with some wonderful visions and hearts. I am so glad to have met them! This was my first "vendor" event and I loved it, I learned from it and I want to grow from it! So inspiring to see other women out there doing what I am doing, and from so many different aspects!

I hope you all had a great holiday "weekend" and remember those who will have holidays that aren't quite as happy as they used to be for multiple reasons that life throws at us all at random times. Pray for those you do and do not know and love your neighors!